Wednesday Wisdom: "Ladies Get Your Own Bags"

With Valentine's Day around the corner, I saw this post and thought it spoke volumes. I agree with everything Funke Fatai said in this post. I believe there are gender roles, especially in the African culture, with expectations for the man to provide the money and the woman to cook and clean. Society puts such a heavy burden on the man to provide a lifestyle for the woman that she can't provide for herself. Now granted, I do believe a man SHOULD provide for his woman and his family. It is part of his responsibility to be a provider. I also think part of a woman's responsibility is to cook, clean and nurture her family. BUT I believe people forget that relationships, whether dating or marriage is a partnership.

BOTH parties should bring something to the table. The man should provide, but that doesn't mean he can't help around the house with cleaning and cooking. Also, I strongly encourage women to have their own "bags" aka money. The Proverbs 31 woman was industrious and resourceful. "She seeks wool and flax, and willingly works with her hands. She is like the merchant ships. She brings her food from afar. She also rises while it is yet night, and provides food for her household. She considers a field and buys it; From her profits she plants a vineyard." --Proverbs 31:13-16. Even the biblical woman didn't just cook, but she also brought money to her home.

Now this last point is NOT to offend anyone. I know there are a lot of successful homes with the man being the only provider. Do what works best for your home, I'm NOT judging those homes. BUT for me, as a woman, it would scare the crap out of me to be completely financially dependent on a man. Having no money of my own? Depending on the man to pay everything for me? I don't know about you, but that doesn't sit right with me. This does not always happen, but I feel being solely dependent on a man for finances gives the man a lot of power and control over you. Now there are GOOD men out there that will NOT abuse that power and will lovingly provide for their woman, but lets not forget there are some men who might abuse that financial power. I'd rather just have my own bags and not give room for that. To each and their own.


With Valentine's Day around the corner, I want to encourage ladies to also do something sweet for their men. YES, we still expect flowers, chocolate, gifts etc., but also reciprocate that love and give your man a gift back. Men like gifts as well. And if you're single this Valentine's Day that's okay, take yourself out on a date and buy yourself some chocolate and flowers. #SelfLove is Key.


As always thanks for taking time to read my blog!! Make sure to subscribe if you haven't subscribed yet. Stay tuned for Saturday blog post Life Lesson.

Always keeping it real,
Titiana Ngongang
Life, Faith &Love