Deliverance from Suicidal Thoughts, Pornography and Depression Testimony: Week 2 Testimony (Lemia) #LifeFaith&Love
I am so excited for you guys to read this week testimony. I am so proud of this beautiful young lady for being so brave and strong in her identity in Christ to share her story. Her testimony is powerful and I believe will be very relatable. Before we get into her testimony, I want to give you guys a few facts. According to the National Institute of Mental Health about 17.3 million people had at least 1 depressive episode in 2019, suicide was the 10th leading cause of death in the U.S. in 2018 (taking 48,000 lives) and millions of people struggle with pornography addictions.
The devil has so many people bound in chains and will do anything to get us distracted and out of God's purpose for our lives. Praise God one of our sister's in Christ has been able to conquer by the power of God depression, suicidal thoughts and pornography and today she boldly shares her testimony. If God did it for her, I know He can do it for you too. I will be sharing her testimony in parts, because it's a bit long, but I really want you to read everything and digest her story. I will share part 2 of her story on Wednesday, stay tuned.
Lemia's Testimony: Part 1
"Growing up I
always knew God but I didn’t KNOW my God. Waking up early every Sunday morning
always felt like a chore. And that’s simply because I knew God just because of my
family but I didn’t know God for myself. Growing up I went to a Luthern church
and I never connected, I would always just sit there in the sanctuary thinking
about what I’m going to do after church or thinking of whether I’m going to get
a glazed donut or a cookie after service. It became a routine where I started
growing up not taking God seriously thinking I had to go to church just to pay
my dues and then carry on with my life. This has been going on for years and I
always thought something was wrong with me just because I didn’t see or feel
like my siblings had that same effect as I did. Not knowing that the devil was
trying to distract me by pulling me away from God because even though I didn’t
know it at that time the devil knew that my Father was trying to gift me and
use me for a bigger purpose in life.
I was so disconnected from God at a young age the enemy introduced me to pornography leading into falling into depression then leading into suicidal thoughts and then into actual attempts. I did not actually know what pornography really was at age 9-10 but I knew it wasn’t good, but it was intriguing to my young mind to watch here and there. Eventually, when I got into high school that’s when I fell into depression. I didn’t know why I felt down all the time and I hated myself for feeling the way I did. I started slitting my forearm because it was a way to ease the unexplainable pain that I felt. I would make sure I wore a long sleeve or sweaters just to cover up the slits, now, throughout high school, I played basketball meaning the more I cut the deeper and revealing it was so I had to stop. That’s when suicidal thoughts started kicking in and going to church every Sunday didn’t help because at that point I felt worthless and for some reason, I felt like God didn’t love me and that’s the reason why I’ve always felt different.
There has been a couple of times at night where I would be on my bedroom floor crying my heart out with a knife in my hands but every time when I thought I built enough courage to let go there was always a voice in my head saying, “don’t do it, it’ll get better.” It was tough but it did get a little better, during that time I fell in love with Sonnie Badu’s music, and he saved me through his songs because as I would listen to them every day eventually the suicidal thoughts went away (God really works in mysterious ways because He definitely was using him)...."
Lemia's Instagram: Lamimi_45
Lemia's Christ/Faith Instagram: Stridinggracefully
Readers, please stay tuned on Wednesday I will continue with Lemia's powerful testimony. God is so good and faithful. Again, I want to encourage you to step out of your comfort zone and share your testimony. The devil wants to keep us quiet, afraid and ashamed to share our story, but there is POWER in sharing your testimony. It's put the devil to shame, it gives God the glory, and it also can be the catalyst to someone else's healing/deliverance. You'd be surprised how many people are going through the same thing you are. Go ahead and email me your story at Ngongang94@gmail.com. I can also keep you anonymous if you'd prefer.
Revelations 12:11, "We overcome by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony."
Always keeping it real,
Titiana Ngongang
Life, Faith &Love
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